I feel like I went through so much of my life not knowing the value of a true, honest friendship. But honestly, I was a terrible friend myself. When I was younger, so much of my identity was wrapped up in how much a boy loved me. Looking back, I had no idea what love was. I was so insecure and needed validation from whomever I was dating at the time, and my friends always took a backseat to whatever dating plans I had.
When I went through one of the darkest times in my life, is when I turned my back on female friendship altogether. My very private and painful details of my failing marriage were being exposed by the people I thought were my closest friends. After that, my wall went up and I was done.
Then the adventure of opening a business happened and I had convinced myself that I had no time for friends. My Husband and I were on a good path, and I was trying to be a good mom and wife while trying to grow a new business. I felt stretched thin, weak in my faith and empty. My heart was yearning for someone to relate with. God knew what I needed, even if I was failing to communicate well with Him at the time. He started placing the most amazing women in my lives from business owners to moms and most, if not all, where unapologetic Jesus freaks. They tell you in business you should hang around people more successful than you because it makes you better. Well I wanted to surround myself with other women that I admired for their faith. The ones on fire for God. I wanted to be more like them. I feel like so many times, as women, we are afraid to be around other women who are better than us. Because we do what we do best...compare. But comparison is the thief of joy and it's robbing you.
I have learned so much from those women, and I am eternally grateful for them. In the process of finding friends I have learned to love myself, cheer other badass ladies along and grow in my faith with God. My circle is still small, but it's solid.
"A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you've become, and still gently allows you to grow."